Career Decisions, Career Decisions

Within the last couple of weeks, my supervisor gave me a very challenging assignment. She wants me to decide what I want my career path to be within the agency and to write a narrative on why I deserve a raise compared to the other administrative assistants. That assignment I think is going to be the most difficult. Difficult mostly because a) I don’t know how my position compares to the other assistants in the agency (we all work for different programs), b) because I don’t feel that it is right for me to compare myself to others in order to get a raise, and c) because, from what I’ve been told, this agency doesn’t give raises at all except for COL raises. So why on earth she would want a narrative from me on why I should get a raise, I don’t know. I’ll do it anyway though.

I think I’ve almost come to a decision for the first assignment. Although that depends on a lot more things than who leaves the agency when. In the narrative, I think I’m going to keep it general though. I think I would be in one of three positions: business or assistant manager of the program I am currently in, Executive Assistant to the CEO, or the Executive Assistant/Headstart “Coordinator” (I don’t know the exact position name). If I can learn the position without officially expanding my education, I will. At least for the time being. I would like to at least get my bachelor’s eventually. I had considered going into the for-profit arena again, but felt that it didn’t reflect my values, goals in life, or my personality. Now, to be a manager, or in a role that has authority, goes against some fears of mine. Mostly to do with confrontation and making people do things that they don’t want too. But I’ve come to the realization that if I don’t ever put myself into situations that require this, I’m not going to learn how to deal with it. The skills necessary to deal with confrontation and uncomfortable social situations are not something that I want to go without. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll have a lot to learn other than that as well, but those are my main sticking points.

I have learned, perhaps the hard way, that you have to live with the decisions you make. Not matter how much you think about, worry about, or wish you hadn’t is every going to change the past. It is what it is. The only thing we can change is now, and hopefully what we do now will affect the future positively. This might be a main reason I’m having difficulty with this very large, life changing decision.

It’s Been a While

It seems like forever since I’ve posted. Life has been very busy, and, as always, things have been changing very quickly. For instance, not to long ago my sister-in-law and her fiance weren’t sure if they were going to graduate from college, but that has since changed to at least my sister-in-law graduating, most likely. We don’t know about her fiance yet. He has been accepted at a college in Boston, so, as long as he graduates, they will be moving out there. We will miss them, but we also are supposed to get there apartment, if all things work out as planned. We’ll see what happens, this is a big life change for them, and would require my sister-in-law to move away from family and friends, which is something that she is struggling with, understandably.

The front in Montana has been changing quite a bit as well (my family is currently located there). My sister, who is 16 – almost 17, has a new boyfriend, has been going through a lot of challenges with family and friends, and now my family might be moving back to NY (although at one point it was just going to be my Mom and possibly the two youngest children). They have been having her work in their newly opened butcher shop (which, according the they Child Labor Laws of Montana is illegal), and she has been struggling with it because of her cutting history/long hours. So we really have no idea what’s going to happen there.

As far as my job goes, everyone seems to like me, and I’m learning fast. The job itself is really nice, but this past week has been somewhat stressful. I took my first hotline call, and the person was in a near panic attack when she was talking to me; and then I had some other people call the office that were either having panic attacks or were frantic. My job also requires me to read a lot of articles regarding sexual assault/rape/domestic violence, which, when it accumulates, can be difficult to deal with. It has even been affecting my sleep, which in turn is not helping me deal with the things that I am exposed to day in and day out. Any suggestions on how to deal with this job stress?

Spring = Rain :(

This is the one unfortunate thing about spring – rain. Although, it doesn’t make me feel so bad about being cooped up inside all the time. I’ll be even less happy when everything is warmed up enough that everything gets coated in mud. Oh well.

Well, I have some good and bad news on the apartment search front. My sister-in-law and her family are going to be moving in the late summer, not sure exactly where yet, but most likely Boston; and, the good news is… they’ve promised us that we can take over their apartment when they leave. Bad news is that we won’t be able to move until the summers over, which means getting harassed for about another five months or so. Yuck! The bad news is also that my sister-in-law and her family will be moving so far away. And with gas prices the way they are, it will be difficult to see them ever.

Job’s going really well. I just finished taking the Rape Crisis Counselor class this last weekend, so now I’ll actually be able to have a weekend on a regular basis (hopefully). Oh, yesterday was the first day here for one of the guys that I used to work with at McDonald’s. It’s kind of funny how it happened. Apparently, right after I quite McDonald’s and they were making a big to-do about it, this guy got the job (the day after, to be more precise), and gave his notice. As you can imagine they weren’t to happy. Oh well. We’re both improving our lives and helping our community, which is what really matters.

Tomorrow is my husband’s, dare I say, 25th birthday! I’m so happy for him…and for the dinner we are going to be having. We’re having lobster tail, steak, and bacon wrapped asparagus (you should try it it is really good) for dinner; and chocolate cake with peanut butter frosting, and peanut butter cup ice cream for desert. Sounds wonderful, doesn’t it? I can’t wait!

It’s Almost Spring!

I can’t believe it! Someone in the office reminded me that tomorrow is the first day of spring – and I couldn’t believe my ears. I wasn’t expecting it, it really snuck up on me this year. And to think – Easter is this Sunday and I am so not ready. Oh well, Easter isn’t here yet.

So, this new job. I’m taking a class called the Rape Crisis Class. It will certify me to help people in very difficult situation, etc. It’s really been very helpful. The job is going wonderfully. I couldn’t have hoped for a better place to work. Although, my poor husband is jealous of me because I have contact with adults, a good job, and events and such to go to. It’s not that he doesn’t want me to have those things too, he’s just been trying so hard to get those things, and it just hasn’t happened yet. That may be because something better is out there for him, in my opinion anyway. It could be that his painting will take off, and he’ll live his real dream. We’ll see what happens.

This job has been very good for me. Even though I am still adjusting to working during the day, I am not depressed (or at least not as much), but I am still definitely tired most of the time. Yeah coffee!!!

More later…

Last Night

My last day at McDonald’s was very different than I had expected. The previous two evenings at work were rather incredible (and difficult), but I do not feel like going into details. My last evening at work, I was given only one position to fulfill, a free shake, and I wasn’t harassed at all, which I don’t think has happened since I started working there. Overall, my last day there was good.

It is very difficult getting myself to realize the fact that I’m never going to have to work there again. It’s a very nice thought, but a little weird.

I’m almost set for Monday. I just need to get a pair of work pants and some stockings, and then I should be set.

More later…